Married to Medicine has finally returned to the airwaves for it’s 3rd season as episode #1 aired last night (June 7, 2015).

Bravo synopsis:

The first ladies of medicine are back and busier than ever. Simone and Toya?s friendship is on the fence, but when Toya decides to throw a Halloween party to show off her new house, her husband Eugene insists she invites Simone to bury the hatchet.

Quad is full speed ahead with her puppy couture line but when Quad learns Lisa Nicole ran a background check on her for ?business? reasons, the two have a fall out.

Meanwhile, Dr. Jackie?s latest endeavor is to test out a lifestyle fitness program on the girls and hopefully everyone is willing to jump on board.

[Sidebar: I haven’t had a chance to watch the first episode but thankfully loyal reader @QueTheCreator was kind enough to write a full recap for me.]

So without further adieu, check out the 5 ‘Life Lessons’ revealed on episode #1 of Married to Medicine’s 3rd season + watch full video below…

VIDEO: Married to Medicine Season 3, Episode #1Lesson I: New house, new neighborhood. Same ancient ass bully.

The episode opens with stunt queen Toya revealing to viewers the everyday challenges she faces living in her newly rented home: her husband works extra shifts to pay for it but has lost little to no weight. Toya did not mention this fact, but it becomes apparent to viewers when they set their eyes on her husband.

While negotiating future financial decisions with her husband, Big Genie, Toya, excited to impress the other ladies with her borrowed property, begins planning an adult-themed Halloween Party. She estimates that the party will roughly cost the upwards of $6,000.

Big Genie and Toya make careful decision on which guests to invite to this party. Toya boldly vouches not to invite Dr. Simone, a proposal Big Genie disagrees with. Toya reminds Big Genie that Simone is a ?big old ancient ass bully,? but her husband decides to invite Simone and her husband anyway.

Lesson II: No Mariah, no drama?

Since Mariah?s demotion, Heavenly and Simone have grown closer. During a car ride to pick up their children, Heavenly asks Simone if she will attend Toya?s Halloween party. Simone responds that was not invited to Toya?s party and has little interest in attending.

Dr. Heavenly attempts to quell Simone?s anxiety. ?I think Toya has diarrhea at the mouth,? she tells Simone, ?and has said some things? that have offended others, a crime which all the women (except Jacky) are guilty.

With Mariah out of the picture, will the drama stop? Hell no…

Lesson III: Business is BOOMING at the Bailey Agency

Cynthia Bailey made no appearance on this week?s episode, but bankrupt businesses and couture clothing lines did. Quad is now promoting her puppy couture line and is on her way to becoming a canine clothing mogul. According to Quad, online sales for her pet clothing are through the roof, yet no receipts were provided to confirm this.

Boring Girl Lisa Nicole Kardashian is still working on her clothing line (for humans), aiming to transform it from a local boutique in downtown Atlanta to a profitable franchise. Outside of her career business, Lisa Nicole Kardashian is also snooping in the business of the other ladies. During the summer of 2014, she ran background checks on her castmates. This upsets Quad, who is prepared to confront Lisa Nicole Kardashian about this at Toya?s party.

?Lesson IV: Be a witness to fitness

Dr. Jackie has created a fitness program designed specifically to encourage lifestyle changes and stimulate weight loss. Jackie meets with her fine ass personal trainer by the name of Al, and the two discuss which cast members could benefit the most from her new business venture.
Jackie cheerfully hopes that Heavenly and Big Genie will participate in the newly minted program. Jackie suspects that though Heavenly could benefit the most from it, she will not apply for a membership.??Lesson

V: The Rented House Party

The women arrive to Toya?s party in unique costumes. Lisa Nicole Kardashian is a police officer. Quad is a Vegas Showgirl (Why?). Heavenly appears as a patient with ass shots (K. Michelle?). Toya and Dr. Jackie get creative and dress as Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen (a pair of skeletons).

All Hell breaks loose at the party shortly after Lisa Nicole Kardashian sits down with Jackie, Quad, and the rest of the women. Quad fumes that Lisa Nicole Kardashian performed a background check on her.

According to Lisa, Quad fears the background check will uncover new truths about Quad?s past, like her conviction for aggravated assault and what actually destroyer her friendship with Mariah.

From Quad?s perspective, Lisa is a messy troll and has no good intention by doing this. She delivers Lisa a lazy read, ?Calling her sleepy hollow.?

Heavenly and the rest of the group make Lisa aware they had no problem with the background check. When the conflict between Quad and Lisa de-escalates, a new conflict emerges between Simone and Toya. Simone erupts after Toya threatens that she will beat Simone?s ass in her rented home.

Jackie, Heavenly, and Quad struggle to calm the two women, but the drama has only begun.

What did you think of episode #1 of Married to Medicine’s 3rd season?