Oscar-winning actress Jennifer Hudson faced severe heartache after the triple-murder of her family members but she didn?t let the tragedy allow her to lose focus.? Successful singer and actress, happily married and mother to a gorgeous toddler, J-Hud recounts the tragedy and for the first time publicly she broke down.

“It’s all a blur. It was surreal,” she said Monday during an episode of VH1’s documentary series “Behind the Music.” “It was like I was outside of myself.”

Jennifer lost her 57-year-old mother Darnell Donerson, 29-year-old brother Jason Hudson and 7-year-old nephew Julian King. Hudson?s mother and brother were found dead in the house, her nephew was found dead in a vehicle.

All three family members were shot in a triple homicide which put the R&B singer into a deep depression. William Balfour, the estranged husband of Hudson’s sister Julia, has been charged with the murders.

Soon after the murders, Hudson disappeared from public view. Recounting her days at the time that she spent with family and friends, Hudson said, “I prayed when I’d get up in the morning and prayed before I laid down at night,” she said. Later, she got engaged to David Otunga and has a son born last August.

In case you missed it, check out the full episode of VH1’s Behind the Music: Jennifer Hudson:

Props: MrsGrapevine