Bob Whitfield: 7 Reasons Why Women Cheat…

[Note from ATLien: I was planning to do a post on this the other day and mentioned it to my friend Bob Whitfield, who decided to share his two cents. For the record, I have absolutely NOTHING to do with this commentary. These are all BOB’S views and opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of me… ATLien!]

Seven reasons why your woman would cheat on you….

#7. “Soft as Twinkie Filling”

You have the ferociousness of a tabby cat and she wants a mean old lion. A man needs to understand how to dominate a submissive women.

She will seek out restraint from another man just to compensate for the lack of manhood around her. Somebody has to pee standing up….

#6 ” Eww Nasty”

She has a sexual appetite that one man is unable to fulfill or sustain. Different from “#7” this is pure sex and for a man that feels that he has all that his women needs will be for a rude and crude awakening, when you come home and she is having a leather clad gang bang in the middle of the den.

#5. “The Terry McMillan”

It happens only once and on some tropical island with some strange island mandingo.

This one-time tryst is usually spawned out of marital discontent that transpires to a quick feel good by your woman. Usually the only way her mate will find out is if the timing and the complexion of the baby only correlates to her “Cum back to Jamaica ” vacation.

#4. “My Hi School SweetHeart”

This is the dude that all dude’s are worried about, if he aint that dude.

This is the man that has your woman’s “GOAT” think of the scene in “Dead Presidents” when Cutty says, “how you think she learned how to suck you”.

She can always go back to this one.

#3. “Tits for tat-dow”

This is in the bible as an “eye for an eye” or a trick for a trick. This cheat by your woman is only caused by the degree of what you have been busted for.

See when Kobe Bryant’s lil ‘tit’ got nabbed with his petey wheat in ole girl dookie shoot, the ‘tat’ on that is pretty raunchy.

A classy return from your woman is usually a romp with your teammate , at the house, on video, with a note saying, “payback is a bitch”.

#2. “Her vs Him”

This slight infraction occurs when the relationship can end at any moment. So technically you are together but not THAT together.

For most men this is when you have not hit that thing in 3 or more months but starting to see the ample fitness regimen has your woman prime and in heat. Don’t go looking thru the panty drawer fellas… acting a fool, cause at this moment, the guy she is with could be your replacement.

#1. “It’s all your fault”

The number 1 reason a woman will cheat on her man is… when he is responsible in doing everything to make her feel less a woman.

This is a man’s self inflicted wound, his woman being scorned and forsaken. Treat her right and you will be rewarded with dominion over her.

This cheating by your woman comes in different forms however, not just sex. Your woman is seeking counsel with another man. She is inspired by another man’s word. She is persuaded to do another man’s bidding.

This is a relationship parable from the good book:

When Eve came with the fruit from the forbidden tree, Adam being “#7″ after he allowed her to #6” with that snake even though he was her “#4” and there is no “#5” better than the garden; unless another rib was being removed “#3” was no issue and what god has brought together let no “#2” put asunder.

So Adam… This would have been the #1 case of domestic violence when you slapped that damn apple out of Eve’s mouth.

These words of life and actuality are from Bob Whitfield’s doctrine for Male Existence the ‘L.M.O.T.T.P.’

I’m sure there are many reasons we can add to this list.

Ladies… what say you??