We all have at that one Facebook friend who changes their relationship status about once a month… (as if we care).
Then there are those who post every single “date night,” gift… and/or cuddle session on all of their social media accounts, as if they want the whole wide world to know that they are head over heels in love and on the path to forever.
[Sidebar: Major props to Angela Simmons for keeping her private life PRIVATE… but I digress!]
I recently came across an article that basically says that oftentimes couples who post their entire life stories on Facebook are likely suffering from problems in their relationships and/or don’t even have one.
A picture of a trip to the beach; a selfie waiting in line at the grocery store; a morning snap of them in bed — It may look like your married friends are happy when they constantly post pictures of themselves on Facebook but relationship experts say this can be a deceiving practice. It turns out the more couples expose their intimate lives on social media, the more likely they’re suffering from problems inside the relationship.
Duh! Like… who DIDN’T know this? Read more from this fascinating article below…
According to a recent article published by ATTN, couples who post all their sappy sweet social media posts are most likely to be the ones experiencing trouble in paradise.
The reference the self-help book “The Truth About Cheating” by psychotherapist and author M. Gary Neuman, which explains how couples who overshare personal information on social media likely feel anxiety about their relationship.
Neuman referenced a 2014 study which found that on a daily basis, the more insecure that people felt about their relationship, the more they post about it on social media sites like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram… etc.
Neuman’s isn’t the only study that examined the role of social media in relationships. One such study from Albright College discovered that couples who post in order to brag about their partners and/or keep tabs on them, only do so to calm their own fears.
Researchers found that people high in Relationship Contingent Self-Esteem (RCSE) — when you base your self-worth on how well your relationship is going — did share a lot of loving posts, but they also engaged in more malicious behaviors online too.
“These results suggest that those high in RCSE feel a need to show others, their partners and perhaps themselves that their relationship is ‘OK’ and, thus, they are OK,” Gwendolyn Seidman, Ph.D, one of the study’s researchers, told The Atlantic.
But wait, Psychology Today reports that couple’s who use social media are likely to experience more pitfalls in their relationships than those who choose to keep their ‘relationship status’ offline… including more jealousy in the relationship, greater relationship dissatisfaction and even more cheating!
For the record, it’s totally possible to be in a happy, secure relationship AND post about it on Facebook, but experts say that most good relationships have an air of privacy about them that keeps it special and helps to maintain an intimate connection between the two parties involved.
“The fact is, when wonderful things happen to you in your relationship, you want keep that private — your little jokes, your little fun,” he said.
“It’s not all about telling everyone else. When you share with other people you lose some of that connection and privacy.” (source)
The expert’s advice? It’s a good idea to post sparingly and keep your relationship off-the-grid. He also notes that when you see other couples constantly posting “Lovey Dovey” moments, things are not always what they seem.
What do you think about this latest study on relationships & social media?
Do you agree with the psychological studies? Or Nah?